WTF?
Published on April 28, 2005 By just john In Marriage
My wife’s grandmother (whom I am very close to) got seriously ill this week and was hospitalized. Immediate reaction was to jump in the car and go. Her grandfather is old and will need some help and grandmother and family will need the support. I have very few paid days off left this year because of a broken ankle I suffered in January. I was willing to stay as long as I was needed or until my days ran out.

My wife is in school and is getting close to graduation. She doesn't work. My income doesn't pay all of the bills. My wife knows this. When she was working we were getting out of debt ... we had money left over at the end of the month ... and she had a 3.6 GPA. Now she doesn't work and bills go unpaid ... we can't afford to rent a movie ... and she has a 2.5 GPA. (sorry for the rant, but this is only a little of the frustration) She has to work to make our household work. Earlier this year she sent out resumes and did a few follow ups. She was not able to find a job in her field. I don't care if she works as a fry cook at McDonalds. We just need a couple of hundred bucks a month to make ends meet. I have asked her forever to get a job. I have demanded that she get a job. I am obviously talking to myself.

Now that her grandmother has gotten sick, she has decided (on her own - without even asking me how I felt about it) that she needs to drive 3.5 (each way) hours each weekend (she is out of school on Mondays and Fridays) to help her Grandmother out. I got pissed as I heard her discussing it with another family member and said something about it. She made me sound like the bad guy.

I am the guy that pays for her school and supports her while she goes. I think I deserve to know about a decision like that before anyone else.

Am I wrong?

Comments
on Apr 28, 2005
No, you are NOT wrong BUT.....very often an illness in the family causes the other members to switch priorities. Obviously the Grandmother is very loved and is in need of extra attention while she is ill. It might be wise to 'bite the bullet' for awhile, in order to show your support in the situation.
I am assuming {and pray} that Granma will soon be well and things will go back to normal. Be supportive of your wifes decision, it will strenghten your relationship.