It matters even if you are angry
I think that being consistent in whatever you do is important. I am not saying change isn't good but if you take a stand, be firm. I have learned over my time on earth that you must pick your battles. If you try to fight them all you won't win very many. I stick to the things that I have a good hold on or think that my opinion is the totally correct one. I don't start many wars and I don't go looking for trouble. For the most part, I will hold something in for a while even if it is a battle I choose to fight. I don’t like to jump into things without thinking them through.
Now how does that apply to being consistent? Case in point. For over a year now my wife hasn't held a job. She does some occasional work but the paydays are always far off and the money never seems to do any good as we are so far in the whole when it comes in that it rarely makes a difference. For that time I have been firm in my request. "Get a steady job doing whatever. Add a couple of hundred bucks to our bottom line each month and I will be happy." My wife is a full time student and has been for almost the past five years. In that time she held a full time job. At one point, we had four children in our care. We both worked full time. We were busy but everything worked financially. It might have been by the skin of our teeth but it worked. I know she is capable of this.
Her argument is "I can't". To me this means I won't because I already know that she can. I have worked for the same people for the last five years. I started out as a contract PC tech and am now a salaried Net Admin. As a PC guy I also do lots of side jobs whenever I can get them. I also will do any odd job that someone will pay me to. I'll cut grass or help you build a house if the price is right. The difference here is that I believe I can so I do. It never fails though. No matter how much I do it is never enough.
When she asked to take in her brothers four children I had my doubts that we could do it but I was committed to her. Now here I am all of that is gone and I only want one thing. Get a small job so that if we want to go get dinner out or go see a movie, I don't have to feel guilty that something is going to go unpaid. I know that may seem petty to some but I stay busy with lots of other things. I get a couple of nights off a week. I would happily get a second job if it didn't interfere with the one that pays the bills. I remain committed and consistent. It's just not enough.